4 December 2014
Maybe it’s only me, I’m not sure, but there seem to be far more single mothers around than ever before.
I guess, though, this is not surprising given the structural changes which have been occurring in general society over the last 20-30 years. Changes such as the very high divorce and separation rates. Or maybe even the fact that there is less social pressure to get married these days, if the lady in question does find herself pregnant.
Many women are also far more independent than ever before, with great qualifications and good careers. Why do they need a full time man or husband—maybe someone who, after the first few years of marital bliss, perhaps begins to abuse her mentally or physically or is jealous of her career achievements? So, why marry or commit to a long term relationship when you can be self supporting financially and still achieve your goals without having a “significant other” who may, at the end of the day, turn out to be incompatible?
Not to say that all relationships end bitterly.. No way!! I do believe strongly in marriage, and when two people love each other and stay with each other through all of life’s trials and tribulations, perhaps even raise a family, that’s lovely. I love seeing elderly couples together holding hands, who have been married for many years… However, some people find it better to be single, and that’s completely fine too! It’s a free world 🙂
Then there are the ladies who have been married and, for whatever reason, have had to end their relationship, or even have had to escape from the relationship; maybe they have been let down by their man in one way or another, so that they have had no choice but to take their child or children and move on.
Some ladies even choose to become single mothers… Having a baby without having a partner. Enjoying being single, wanting to remain independent, yet still want their own family. And there’s nothing wrong with that either! Why should you have to commit to one man forever, in order to be able to have your own family?
A final type of single mother I frequently come across is the, sadly, widowed lady, maybe still in her prime but with one, two or more children around, and finding it hard to attract a new man to her life owing to her family situation.
No matter what their reason, no matter what their own personal situation, I really believe that single mothers are amazing. I have the deepest respect for mothers who battle through life’s trials and tribulations, in many cases on just a just a single income—and sometimes even without the tacit support of their families.
In fact, I have met so many single mothers who are doing a great job, bringing up their children, managing the household and dealing with all of the administrative and financial issues usually associated with families.
What’s more, I have met so many wonderful people who have grown up with a single mother and they, by and large, tend to be nice, well rounded people; the love and attention which the mother has lavished on them, perhaps compensating for the lack of a father figure, often making the person in question more secure and content.
Of course, family is very important… And if a child has a loving mother and a loving father, one would think that would be the ideal situation. I have to put in a good word for us males of the species – we can be good for many things!!! 🙂
Though for so so many reasons, that isn’t always and can’t be the case.
Naturally, even single mothers need someone now and then to give them some love and attention, to give them some quality time to make them feel valued and wanted—whether mentally or physically (or both).
In this relatively liberated day and age, it’s perfectly acceptable for a single mother to indulge herself occasionally; to do something for her and not just her family. A hardworking, single mother needs to be held and loved, needs to feel that companionship just like any other woman with a permanent husband does.
And that’s where I come in.
Dr Leo has the remedies for any lady who needs a bit of special time; needs a period when she can forget about the stresses and strains of her days and simply fall back and relax into the arms of someone who genuinely cares for her….